雨露均沾 Sharing Rain and Dew – Chapter 1 : I think, the Emperor’s brain has gone bad

Translator note :
Readers, please read this note first, this is quite important. Since this is a short story, the author didn’t explain any background, or details. This will be quite confusing at first, but once you finished the story you will understand. I would suggest re-reading the whole story after you reached the end but it’s optional 😛

But please let me explain some details on the author’s behalf. What you must know before starting is our MC’s name is Rong Huai Zhen, and the Emperor’s name is Duan Ming Zhang. Our MC got a second chance in life and somehow went back to half a year before his death. Now, our MC is trying to see if he can prevent his untimely death this time. Without further ado, let us start (0w0)/

*Psst, how many of you don’t know this is BL story?

“How is the taste of the fruit tribute from the two Guang* province?”
[Note : The two provinces (两广) is Guangdong and Guangxi]

I immediately praised sincerely, “Not bad, not bad. The lychees are juicy sweet and fresh. It’s obviously has been carefully selected.”

He smiled, “Lychees if ate too much will raise internal body heat, rinse it in the well first before eating…. LePing, later go and get Zhen’s* portion of lychees and send here also to Marquis ChangAn.”
[Note : Zhen (朕) is used by the Emperor to address himself]

“Unacceptable, unacceptable. This servant remembers Your Majesty also like to eat lychees. How can….”

“You liked it, of course Zhen want to satisfy you.”

He put it so mildly, while I listened until I felt numb. These days, I lost count how many times such dialogues have occurred. If wasn’t the Emperor afraid of the imperial censor will shed tears while preaching at him, I think he will even let me wear his embroidered golden dragon court dress. And if I gave excuses to refuse, the seemingly warm, kind and considerate to subjects Emperor will immediately change his face:

“Since Marquis ChangAn doesn’t looked interested with the lychees, the one preparing the things must be doing his job insincerely. Servants, come. Responsibility….”

“…. Your Majesty, please wait!”

Even though I, Rong Huai Zhen is not some loyal, straightforward great state official, but I’m not from a generation of great wicked and evil either. How can I see bystanders suffering blame from this tyrant because of me? I endure! If not for the Emperor’s most favored Concubine Chen sent someone to invite the Emperor over to her place, I think he would have sat aside watching me again. Watching me eat until I finished eating all the lychees he gave, just like last time with the dried persimmons. Those persimmons were really sweet ah!

I ate about one catty*, and my throat became sore and thirsty for three days. But (I) don’t dare to have a single word of complain. Have you ever seen hostages complaining to kidnappers about getting unsatisfactory food and poor treatments before?
[Note : 1 catty is about 0.5kg]

So right now, I am just like my name, heart full of sincerity singing praises for three days, head getting dizzy for five days, and one heartache for delicate flower reflecting on water, the weak willow Concubine Chen.
[Note : No idea what the author is going about, but the MC’s name if separately translated would be Tolerate/Heart/True]

Although from previous life, she ….. previous life…. Duan Ming Zhang towards me, it obviously won’t be like this1You will understand this sentence after finishing the whole novel. If not for my Big Brother and Second Brother both leading troops to northwest, I guessed he would not notice that there is a mediocre, unnoticeable youngest (son) in the House of Marquis Ding Bei. My Big Brother and Second Brother still haven’t get married, haven’t settled down so before leaving, Big Brother requested to have me appointed as Shizi*2Note : Shizi (世子) means heir son, it usually refers to the heir of Qinwang, the Emperor’s brother. Info copied from novel translation of The Evil Prince and His Precious Wife : The Sly Lady. In the previous life, the Emperor granted it, and invited me into the Palace to ‘take care of me’. In this current life, the Emperor changed the edict and granted me the title of Marquis ChangAn, but still inviting me into the Palace to ‘take care of me’. Our family of three huddled together, looking at the Emperor’s edict, puzzled. What my Big Brother and Second Brother thought were why the stingy, short-tempered Emperor suddenly became so generous ah? What I thought was it couldn’t be that Duan Ming Zhang has also been reborn right?

….. but it’s not right ah, if he was reborn also ………..

If he didn’t give death sentence to our House, it’s already fine but to grant title? (His) Brain must have gone bad. So I suddenly became very open-minded, thinking since my Big Brother and Second Brother will be just like previous life, bringing victory back home from the war. Then I earnestly reminded my Second Brother, “Second Brother, you must take good care of Big Brother ah. Don’t let him stay up late to study the Art of War. The next day inspecting the army with dark circles under the eyes, extremely scary.”

My Second Brother Rong Huai Fang said, “… Got it, I will definitely look out for him.”

Then I turned to earnestly reminded my Big Brother, “Big Brother you must take good care of Second Brother ah, you mustn’t let him kick away the quilt in the middle of the night. If later on caught a cold, it will be bad.”

Then my Big Brother Rong Huai Duan said, “….. Got it, I will definitely cover him up.”

In this case, the army should be coming back one day ahead of schedule ba ….

Releasing a breath, I then happily entered the Palace. Since this time around, I have mastered the essentials of surviving the harem anyway. As the saying goes ‘Fall into the moat and you’ll be wiser next time’, in this lifetime, I will definitely won’t do anything possible to offend the concubines in the harem. [Note : Idiom, 吃一堑长一智 means learning from one’s mistakes]

For example, alarming Concubine Wan’s cat ah, interrupting Concubine Cen’s dance ah, picking the flowers that Lu GuiQing has planted ah, eating the yogurt that Concubine Chen want to eat ah….
[Note : GuiQing (贵卿) is a title specially given because normal titles didn’t include male Consort in it]

My ideal was very plump, but the reality was too bony. On my third day in the Palace, I finally found out later on and with much fear that the Emperor, hhe..he.. his brain really had gone bad! The Emperor has three Palace, six Courtyards, seventy-two concubines, a harem of three thousand beauties. Even if he wanted to sleep with one each day, he will have enough to sleep with for ten years. And even his most favourite Concubine Chen, I heard the attention she has at most was only two days in a month. But ever since I entered the Palace, the Emperor visited my temporary residence at Hai Qing Pavilion everyday, sometimes even twice a day! This lifetime, I have yet the time to do anything, have offended the Emperor’s whole harem of three thousand beauties….